Congratulations to Johnny Depp, who won his first People’s Choice Award tonight as Favorite Male Movie Star! Johnny was not present in the Pasadena Civic Auditorium to accept the award; instead, he sent one of his tongue-in-cheek taped acceptance speeches, similar to his acceptance of the MTV Award in June. Sheryl Crow, who introduced the category and announced Johnny as the winner, said that Johnny was “standing by live somewhere in Eastern Europe,” but he was obviously on a set meant to simulate a gypsy wagon, shaking as if it were being drawn by horses. He wore the same green shirt and gray jacket he wore for his appearance on THE OPRAH WINFREY SHOW in November, but sported Captain Jack Sparrow facial hair, tortoise-shell glasses, and a black newsboy cap. “I want to thank you all very very much,” Johnny told the audience. “I’m terribly sorry I couldn’t be there. It’s a great honor.” Then he began to spin a tall tale. “I’m actually on a mad trek thru the Carpathian Mountains searching for Vlad the Impaler,” he explained, adding a quip about hoping to hook up with Christopher Lee (his co-star in the upcoming CHARLIE AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY and CORPSE BRIDE), who was “doing a duet with Rammstein.”

Turning serious, Johnny added that the award was “a great honor” and he wanted to “say thank you very very much to the people. It really feels good to say that because you in fact are our employer, you are our boss, so thank you very, very much for this great honor.” He concluded with a typical generous impulse: “I hope some day to make you all a cup of coffee.” Okay, Johnny, we accept! Just tell us when and where.